Resist the urge to act like a
child.
Are you like me? Do you ever
find yourself tempted to reciprocate to your child’s snotty attitude with a
mucus-like one of your own?
Resist this temptation and do
your best to remain calm.
Give honest feedback while
making the problem belong to your child.
Kids need to get honest
feedback about how they come across to others…and the impact this is likely to
have on their OWN lives. With a strong dose of empathy, experiment with saying:
When
you stick your tongue out and say those nasty things,
you're
really no fun to be around. I will always love you,
but few
others will if you continue to act that way.
That
would be a pretty lonely life.
Take good care of yourself by
setting and enforcing healthy limits.
Becoming a doormat only teaches
your child to treat others like doormats. Examples of healthy limits include:
I play with kids who talk nicely.
I cook dinner for people who express thankfulness rather than
complaining about what I serve.
Feel free to join us when you can act sweet.
I enjoy providing privileges to kids who talk and act nicely.
Also, set firm limits over
television and video game use.
Most television content
glorifies nasty, sarcastic attitudes. Too much time spent interacting with
video games makes it tougher for kids to display patience and grace with
real-life people.
Nasty looks and nasty comments
aren’t just annoying…they’re hurtful to those who deliver them. That’s why you
shouldn’t feel guilty for taking a firm and loving approach to the problem. For
more tips and techniques read Love and Logic Magic: When Kids Leave You Speechless.
Thanks for reading! Our goal is
to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.
Dr. Charles Fay
